Are you working hard to grow your business, always hustling and not seeing the sparkling results others seem to get so easily? Do you have a business or a hustle?
I often struggle with kids, in a 3 bed house, with modern appliances, I feel tired and overwhelmed by sheer amount of laundry and other house work required just to keep up – and I do have help. I think even live in maid wouldn’t completely solve that – all the mess the kids can create in matter of seconds is beyond my comprehension. So I have help, and yet I still struggle. My aunt practically raised 4 kids in one room before they could afford their own house.
What seems a struggle to me, to her at the time would have been an utter luxury. We both FEEL like we work hard. The difference is perspective.
Funnily enough, I struggle most when things are seemingly easy. I demand more of myself, I want it to be so perfect, it exhaust me. When I don’t have time, I do with what I have to do… and I create results.
I was thinking (the code for faffing, procrastinating and worrying) about launching a video course for ages. Always waiting for better time. And then I said enough of that, even though the kids were sick, even though they were off school, even though I knew it’s going to be harder this way.
I set the date, created gorgeous workbooks and interactive tools in the morning, recorded videos in the afternoon and my course was done in less than 2 weeks.
At times, I felt like crying for sheer stupidity of taking on mammoth task on top of everything else.
At times I felt elated and happy and so, so proud of myself because once I got in the flow creating it seemed so easy.
All that mental anguish was completely unnecessary. Why I couldn’t do it when I had perfect conditions? It’s not a lack of motivation, not the lack of hustle, or knowledge. It’s again, lack of perspective. Things you haven’t done seem harder than they really are.
For me, the hardest part was letting go of the “ideal” course and instead creating a working one. Sure diamonds are pretty, but you can’t eat glittering stones. You need to trade them to make them useful. Someone needs to be willing to pay for them. And if you are stuck with ideal course still in your head, it’s like wearing gorgeous gown and trying to swim. Not happening.
Soon enough you let go of your idea of perfection and tear up that slim fitting trap of the dress or you sink.
Make true commitment to your business and to yourself.
It all starts with that – the decision to stop tolerating what is, and creating change.
Sure it’s risky.
Sure it’s scary.
And the most scariest and painful is facing the truth: you knew all along what’s needed to do it.
You were just not willing to face it and truly change your perspective.
Instead of finding excuses, instead of succumbing to fear, instead of looking for a way out – finding a way in.
Admitting that no one else is responsible for your happiness, it has to come from within you.
COMMIT to yourself. To your business. To your dreams. No one else will.
You don’t need more hustle – you need less. You need to let go of things that are weighing you down.
Change your perspective, change how you think, to explode your business growth and live life on your terms.
You don’t have to work any harder, you just need better strategy.
And to implement any strategy you have to translate it into daily commitment.
And that’s when we discover it’s much easier to invest in a pretty website than yourself.
A website at least you can see, right?
And yourself? That’s harder. That’s invisible. Hard to quantify.
Why do we need to get motivated to find our own happiness anyway? And pay for that? That feels…slightly embarrassing. After all, if we really wanted to do it, we would just DO…?
Wake up earlier, exercise, drink more water, write that blog post and send that newsletter, create that sales page and promote that webinar…
Why we CAN’T just do it?
Why it’s so hard to really commit to yourself, your business growth and show up consistently?
We all know or at least have an idea what we need to do to grow it, but we keep faffing around kidding ourselves that we are working hard (like that would mean anything).
Hard work doesn’t always pay. Hustle doesn’t make anyone successful.
I know plenty of honest, hard working women who are flat out broke and stuck in circumstances beyond their control. I know plenty of women who hustle hard, work long hours and it still doesn’t pay off.
Yes, it takes persistence to start and grow your business. Yes, it takes hard work.
But it is not all it takes, or women in rural Africa that have to walk for miles just to get water would be millionaires.
If you have access to running water you are already way ahead of the game. Imagine the life when you need to spend hours just to fetch water in a scorching heat.
It’s not a guilt trip. Modern conveniences didn’t make us lazy. It made us lose perspective.
We no longer remember what grit is so we are stuck in our heads imagining things being hard and we are backing off.
Because on the cover of my pretty notebook it says: it’s easy when you do what you love?
Easy and hard are a very fluid definitions.
Sometimes it’s harder to stay in a job you hate than quit and start the business you love (even though you are not a quitter and you are petrified of tech). So you do it, and you discover it’s not all unicorns, but it’s still easier than a daily commute. See? It’s not easy, but easier. Fluid.
You don’t like exercising but you love how you feel afterwards (gasping for breath, but yeah, you proved yourself you can do it.) So you continue that torture and you amp the stakes week in week out.
Why it’s so hard to keep promises we make to ourselves?
We make promises to ourselves easily and often, and we break them as fast as we made them.
We have lots of good intentions but life is refusing to be easy.
I know that when the client project is on the line I will make time for it. But if it’s my own project I will find a million of perfect excuses to justify the fact that I am bailing out on myself. So what changed? Perspective.
The pain of explaining myself to client, the pain of being embarrassed for not completing project on time or not showing up, the terrifying prospect of losing my professional reputation outweighs the fleeting pleasure of slacking of and taking it easy.
If my friend waits at the gym, I’ll go. If she doesn’t, my headache will be enough to cancel in lieu of being kind to myself.
It’s hard to keep promises to yourself when they are nothing more than promises.
If you really want to achieve it, you create goals, strategy, and a schedule.
You focus, commit and hustle to make it happen, you have deadlines and progress trackers.
CREATE SYSTEMS TO ELIMINATE YOURSELF and THE NEED FOR WILLPOWER
When you create systems to eliminate yourself, you become the smallest domino in the whole thing, so your lack of willpower won’t matter.
I pick up the kids from school even though it’s raining, while I frequently use weather as an excuse not to exercise outdoors.
It doesn’t have to make sense, but it has to work for you.
Don’t look for ideal plan, ideal system, but one that works. If it holds on a duct tape, it doesn’t matter, buy more tape.
If you can’t make yourself go to gym at 6 am in the morning, order a taxi and pre-pay it. Yes, the very pain of it being expensive exercise will make you work harder on not skipping it.
Eliminate the thinking about and change it into doing it.
Can’t make yourself do webinar? Go live on Facebook. Are you scared of it even more? Good, that changed your perspective.
Do what’s less evil;) But do it.
Make a decision and stick to it and every time you waver: think of an alternative.
You don’t need to have more will power to succeed at accomplishing your goals. You don’t need more motivation.
It’s not going to suddenly become easy, but it will go easier over time.
Just change your perspective.
Are you really committed to your business?
What is the one thing you really want to be more consistent with?
What’s stopping you?